FOCUS: Love is an attitude


We are now halfway through the love month of February and our world is not very loveable. We are living in a world where love is needed everywhere one looks. It is as if love has been replaced with indifference, hate, intolerance, violence, a replacement of God for individual wants, and beliefs in one’s desires. In this time, we are not hearing the truth in the news we watch or listen to. Since the COVID-19 came on the scene, we have been taught to stay safe by wearing a mask which takes away our smiles, do not get close to others, which takes away our hugs and to refrain from visiting others which takes away our acts of friendship. For those who love to attend church and listen to the word of God, our churches have been closed and are now open with less attendance. Our schools are making our children wear masks all day which gives them all kinds of problems. As an adult, do you want to wear your mask all day long?  If you work and have to wear your mask all day at work, do you feel different? Our country is being changed to fear everything around us. We need to turn our attention to making a change with an attitude of love.  We need to turn to the God who is Love.

Late last night, I turned my channel to TBN and watched a great program on the meaning of love. There were several writers who have written books of love and how we should approach love. I had read Dr. Gary Chapman’s book titled ‘Five Languages of Love.’ I have written articles of how we can improve our relationships by using these types of love. In this world, we need love more now than ever. Maybe these languages of love need to be exposed again. Let us begin with the Agape love from the Bible. Agape love should be the focus within our country.  We may not agree but we should still care for one another and work toward the goal of unity in our country. Have we become so uncaring to those around us that we no longer feel the compassion for another human being? Have we seen so much violence in the world, on television, in our streets, in our government that we no longer feel it is important to communicate with others? What has happened to the most important rule that we are asked to live by? I was taught that “Love One Another” was the way to live within our families, our neighborhoods, our communities, and our nation. I have deep concern for today’s society and grave concern for tomorrow’s generation if the word “Love” is no longer remembered and used. We are becoming a non-communicational society where it is more important to text on a phone than to have personal and audible conversations. I am all for technology but feel we have lost the personal feelings that one shares with others. Do we learn love, patience, concern, compassion, feelings and friendship through the words on a text or do we need to connect personally with another human being? Maybe this is why there is so much confusion, anger and divisiveness in America and around the world.

Dr Chapman tells us how to use the attitude of love in special ways with those who need a special kind of love in their lives. We begin in our families. Our families are special.  The first language of love is through words of affirmation. There are those who need to be shown love through compliments and words of encouragement. Some folks are more likely to be motivated to reciprocate with words of affirmation. The second language of love is quality time of being together. Togetherness is a focused attention on the person you are with. We can make a person feel special if we show them that we enjoy being with them and doing activities together. The third language of love is receiving gifts. Gifts do not need to be expensive or even given every day. When we get a card, or a flower or something special, we feel appreciated and loved. The fourth language of love is the act of service. Acts of service can be shared with a spouse, a child, a neighbor or someone who has no one to love them. Dr. Chapman suggests that couples make a list of the things they would like their spouses to do for them. He then suggests that each spouse pick out one or two acts of service and plan to do them for each other. The fifth language of love is physical touch. Physical touch can make or break a relationship. It can communicate hate or love. Everyone loves to be hugged. A hug communicates warmth and security. A kiss on the cheek and a hug from mom or dad makes everything better. During times of sadness at the loss of a loved one, hugs are the comfort one needs to make the sadness bearable.

Communication is a very important part of love. Love is a choice. Loves makes a difference. The Bible tells us to love our enemies. Do good to those who hate you, mock you, criticize you or those who make you feel unworthy. This rule is very hard to communicate at times when our feelings are hurt and the communication is damaged. This rule does not work at all if one fails to communicate. Words to remember! Take care of your thoughts when you are alone and take care of your words when you are with people.

There is still one question that needs to be asked? If you do not love yourself and do not feel good about yourself, how can you love others? Each person is unique and deserves to be loved. Love yourself and then share that love with others. Love is a gift that is freely given. Love is a priceless gift received. Find your language of love and pass it on.

I leave you with these thoughts. Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is.

Only God can turn a mess into a message, a test into a testimony, a trial into a triumph and a victim into a victory. God is Love! Love one another and see how much richer your life is. God’s love is a blessing to all who turn to Him.

“Look back and be grateful. Look ahead and be hopeful. Look around and be helpful. A nation has character only when it is free.” – Madame De Stael

“This nation, under God shall have a new birth of freedom, and the Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.” – President Abraham Lincoln

“You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.” – Amy Carmichael         

“Love is a wonderful thing. You never have to take it away from one person to give it to another. There’s always more than enough love to go around.” – Pamela J DeRoy         

“Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.” – Martin Luther King

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